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Organic Discontent

by Mark Timmins

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1.
Speak to me (free) 04:05
Speak to me with a gentle tongue I don’t feel myself Wait for me with constricted lung I’ve got no story to tell I lie for my sanity I lie for my health Denial shouldn’t be necessity But it grows with such stealth Cradle my neck with your bony fingers You know that I am fragile I want to feel calm and at peace If only for a little while I lie for my sanity I lie for my health Denial shouldn’t be necessity But it grows with such stealth What will change my mind? What will change my mind? Speak to me with a gentle tongue I don’t feel myself Wait for me with constricted lung I’ve got no story to tell I lie for my sanity I lie for my health Denial shouldn’t be necessity But it grows with such stealth What will change my mind? What will change my mind? What will change my mind? What will change my mind?
2.
To the black horizon (free) 02:35
Selfish and distant But I mean to be kind Which of my many faults Now draws my eyes To the black horizon To the black horizon To yearn is not unique But what a sweet surprise To look with renewed fire To the black horizon To the black horizon Imperfect dreams Of an imperfect mind Time to pack up Take what’s left of what’s mine To the black horizon To the black horizon To the black horizon To the black horizon
3.
Vulnerable (free) 01:26
Walking numb and reckless through the trees What’s the good in imperfection? Callous hearts are not anomalies How we selfishly crave affection But we’re so afraid to cry Ooh-ooh-ooooh I don’t want to live a lie Let me be vulnerable this time Take me to the dark of the ocean Where the deep is hard to comprehend Summon now a heady black devotion Making logic easy to suspend ‘Cause we’re so afraid to cry Ooh-ooh-ooooh I don’t want to live a lie Let me be vulnerable this time Walking numb and reckless through the trees What’s the good in imperfection?
4.
Anymore (free) 03:01
Machine of procreation Drew me in to your eyes But they were just a memory By that time Contraception on your floor Says it all far too clearly You are not mine Anymore In that sad vision Your arms held our first child And we looked so happy In that little while But it’s just a dream A nightmare vision what’s it for? ‘Cause you are not mine Anymore And my heart said then It could only be you And my genes said then It could only be you But now that vision Well it doesn’t mean a thing Anymore Anymore Anymore
5.
Pretty wife (free) 02:36
You know your wife looks so pretty But you ain’t never around You know your wife looks so pretty But you ain’t never around I wish I could lie like a man would lie But she’s so desperate That won’t matter tonight She lingers out in the yard In that sweet summer dress She lingers out in the yard In that short summer dress She looks at me Like I might be useful Only fantasy makes this life bearable Oooh Could you make it bearable Aaah Can you make it bearable You know your wife looks so pretty But you ain’t never around You know your wife looks so pretty But you ain’t never at home I wish I could lie like a man would lie But she’s so desperate That won’t matter tonight Won’t matter tonight Won’t matter tonight
6.
Hold me now (free) 03:42
Always looking for a place to hide away A place to truly escape I always want the easy option Always looking for a place to hide away Forever waiting Perfection Can not exist Aah-ahh Hold me now baby Don’t wanna feel this way Hold me now baby Don’t wanna feel this way Always looking for relief that will stay Want it now to be Safely locked within your loving arms Always looking for relief that will stay Not brittle and fleeting Just a step away from a memory Aah-ahh Hold me now baby Don’t wanna feel this way Hold me now baby Don’t wanna feel this way Hold me now baby Don’t wanna feel this way Hold me now baby Don’t wanna feel this way
7.
Remember the taste of my name Remember the taste of my name Kill me in the morning with a rusty blade But remember the taste of my name Kiss my forehead when the night turns dark Kiss my cold lips when the fever cuts hard Break my fragile ribcage And tear out my heart But kiss my cold lips when the fever cuts hard Ooh my pretty babe you’ve got to say it out loud If you really love me Then prove it now When a bird don’t like the winter Then they just fly south Promise me the way home is safe Promise me the way home is safe Promise me the way home is safe Promise me the way home is safe
8.
Count out every Tentative step Without these details Just what would be left Oh who could I be Without the unnecessary Only the darkness knows The details they kill me What to wear and what to eat The details won’t let me Get hardly any sleep Oh who could I be Without the unnecessary Only the darkness knows When my eyes are blurred And my mind is blurred What should I recognise as truth When my eyes are blurred And my mind is blurred What should I recognise as truth The details speak always Of looming catastrophe When the numbers are wrong But I’m sick of this fallacy Oh who could I be Without the unnecessary Only the darkness knows Oh who could I be Without the unnecessary Only the darkness knows
9.
Stay with me My lady Down by the river Tonight Stay with me My lady With your lips pressed tight With your lips pressed tight The river calls For silent wading I’ll take you in To the crown Tonight Your currency It is now fading But I won’t hurt you If that’s alright No I won’t hurt you If that’s all
10.
Without Fail (free) 03:03
File down the edges Of the harsh details Swallow your sweet lies With a mouth full of nails It’s frightening how quickly A fabricated tale Weaves in so deeply In to truth Without fail Make your story manageable Make your story well Memory won’t care at all And the mind cannot tell It’s frightening how quickly A fabricated tale Weaves in so deeply In to truth Without fail Without fail Without fail Without fail Can I truly justify These lies for myself Just to keep my grip from slipping From what’s left of my fragile mental health It’s frightening how quickly A fabricated tale Weaves in so deeply In to truth Without fail Without fail Without fail Without fail
11.
Cheez Whiz Fantasy (free) 01:29
Hey I’ve got a cheez whiz fantasy Hey I’ve gotta get get get some Hey I need a PBS catastrophe Hey But I can’t get no reception I am a thousand miles From the place where I was born And even further From any place that I can call home Hey I’ve got a baseball bat Hey And a baseball glove Hey Apartment cat Hey Monogamous love I am a thousand miles From the place where I was born And even further From any place that I can call home A thousand miles One thousand six hundred kilometres A thousand miles One thousand six hundred kilometres
12.
I know your name (free) 04:53
If I were to grab you by your throat Would you have the strength to get away? Take this down as a note You don’t wanna forget my advice today Can you trust the ones you love? Can you ever trust anyone? Is there something in the water that’s wrong? Is there something in the earth that’s wrong? The natural state that I seek Presents itself as harmony But all that’s organic in me Likes to lie through sneering teeth What is it that should guide my way? What is it I want to say? Is there something in the water that’s wrong? Is there something in the earth that’s wrong? When it comes to suppressing instinct When it comes to possessing who I am Categories and definitions Creations flawed and too human But I know your name baby And you know mine But I know your name baby And you know mine Is there something in the water that’s wrong? Is there something in the earth that’s wrong? Is there something in my heart that’s wrong? There is something in my mind that’s wrong? When it comes to suppressing instinct When it comes to possessing who I am Categories and definitions Creations flawed and too human But I know your name baby And you know mine But I know your name baby And you know mine

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released February 12, 2017

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Mark Timmins Nuremberg, Germany

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